I’ve had a rebellious nature since I can remember. If you say go left, I’ll go right. It’s just innate inside me and something I constantly have to keep in check.
This rebellion of mine loves to rebell, but hates to get caught.
Which is what happened to me the other day.
There I was enjoying a rejuvenating day at the spa after being sick and working through a head cold all week.
I had soaked…
I had steamed…
I had saunaed….
I had cold plunged….
I even caught some zzzz’z in the giant hammock…..
I was so relaxed and empty of all the work, stress, phlegm and achiness I’d been experiencing all week.
This is always when inspiration strikes
I busted out the only thing I had to write with, which was my trusty ipad and I walked right past the sign that said “NO ELECTRONICS” and tucked myself into a corner where I hoped no one would see me.
I got about ¼ into this blog post on 5 taoist practices to help keep your cool during the busiest month of the year (Dec.), when I heard,
“Excuse me Mam, I’m going to have to ask you to put that back in the locker room.”
I looked up to see a thick lipped, deep toned rasta man with shoulder length dreads, and my face went pink.
I could feel all the blood rushing into my center and my extremities went cold.
I was caught in the act of direct rebellion, or disobedience – whatever you want to call it.
I had to be escorted with my electronic device back to the locker rooms by this unusually attractive pool attendant.
What does this have to do with the 5 Taoist Practices you can do this month to keep yourself healthy and in balance?
It just made me laugh later that day and I wanted to share!
The 5 Taoist Practices to Help You Keep Your Cool During the Busiest Month of the Year!
1. Go have a spa day!
Or at least a spa hour … even if it’s at the gym or your local community center!
There is something very nourishing to the nervous system and healing to your soul when you take some time for yourself to just sit in a heated environment and breathe.
When your nervous system gets the chance to drop into a parasympathetic state; healing, health and longevity as well as happiness and a deep sense of contentment come naturally.
As you let the steam open your lungs or the heat cleanse your pores you bring medicine to two of the most vital organs in your body, both of which are responsible for your wei chi aka your immune system.
Think of your time at the spa as preventative medicine so that you don’t get sick and can sustain the energy you need to keep up with this unnaturally busy time.
What do I mean by unnaturally busy?
Winter is the time of hibernation, it is the season of doing less, of sitting in stillness and drinking warm beverages.
But in our modern society it has become one of the most bustling times of the year….. shopping trips, holiday parties, traveling to see loved ones, hanging lights, cutting down trees, baking cookies and if you’re a christmas celebrator – wrapping gifts…… not to mention “wrapping up” the end of the year.
If you do any one of these 5 Taoist Practices you’ll be in the flow of the winter season as nature intended, dropping into the quiet.
2. Yin Yoga, Tai Chi or Chi Gong
Take yourself to a slow moving class where you can let go of your mind and leave your “to do” list at the door.
Allow yourself to be guided through breath and movement that is not meant to make you stronger physically, but to build your mental and spiritual capacity.
This increase in space to your mind is immeasurably beneficial to your ability in keeping your cool during the hectic moments that inevitably come in December.
3. Cut Back on SUGAR aka Carbohydrates
This won’t be the most popular on the list, since there are so many extra yummy sweet treats floating around during the holiday seasons, but I’ll tell you why it’s the most important.
There are many different theories on carbs and how much is ok to eat or not, but the one I have found to be the most doable, sustainable and healthy for my body is the 60g/day rule.
According to some functional medicine experts your pancreas can only pump out enough insulin to counterbalance about 60g of carbohydrates each day.
This is why so many people start showing signs of pre-diabetes and type 2 diabetes levels are higher than they’ve ever been, because of insulin resistance.
More than 60g/day and your pancreas’ beta cells get worn out they can’t keep up with the demand for more and more insulin.
Insulin tells the cells in your muscles,fat and liver to grab glucose out of your bloodstream and put it into their cells for energy. But when it’s not available to do that the glucose builds up in your bloodstream causing big blood sugar imbalances – BAD NEWS!
Because this is not only the path to Type 2 Diabetes, but also increases your risk for heart disease, cancer and stokes…..not to mention it is not helping your immune system out at all!
1 tsp of refined white sugar can suppresses your immune system for up to 7 hours…. so if you are fighting something off, stay away from sugar!
Come February I’ll be hosting a Get Off Sugar Completely in 4 days Challenge, if you’d like to pre-register and save your spot HERE.
It’s free so you’ve not a thing to lose, except some weight, inflammation and fatigue.
In Taoist perspective sweet things (All sweet things- even fruit) causes dampness in the body also known as phlegm or catar.
Basically, these are all bad things that make you feel lethargic, sluggish, slow, cloudy, and unmotivated….. And let’s face it the world around us needs us to be motivated!
4. Call Your Favorite Alternative Health Care Practitioner (maybe that’s me 😉 )
It does not matter if they are your Massage Therapist
Or Cranio-sacral Therapist…..
Just book a session with them, think of it as your gift to yourself this season.
You deserve to spend this time in health and happiness, not stress and overwhelm. They can help! Dial now!
If you’ve never had acupuncture before – try it!
If you only like your feet rubbed and not your whole body – let them know!
Any good healer will be receptive to hearing what you like and how you like it, plus this is a great opportunity to speak your truth!
You can do it!
If you don’t have any holistic practitioners in your area you like to see, book an introductory session with me – An Intimacy Hourto help you get INTIMATE with your inner self.
Understand her. Comfort her. & Free her from the story you’ve been telling yourself.
Every once in a while, it can be SO powerful to revisit the story we’re telling ourselves about our lives – and decide whether or not we want to challenge – or completely change – the script.
During our intimacy hour you will Release the old story that’s holding you back from deep intimacy – and walk away with an individualized prescription for how to step into your new story + A personalized meditation, suggestion, or practice to carry you through this season in good spirits.
This won’t add more to you todo list. It will free you from anxiety and stress – and give you the space to claim your personal power once more.
Get an individualized roadmap for what you can LET GO OF – right away. CLICK HERE TO BOOK YOURS.
5. Practice Appreciation
Even more than a gratitude practice, being in a regular state of appreciation will do wonders for your life!
And they go hand in hand.
(Here’s a link to a video of my daily gratitude practice)
Not only will the people in your life feel more appreciated and reciprocate the favor, but you will actually experience more joy when you are with them.
Right now, I am appreciating the sunlight filtering through the eucalyptus trees as giant white cranes soar by and I enjoy the warmth and coziness of my home whilst the smell of orange rind tea brews on the stove.
2 Keys to any appreciation practice:
1. Use your senses!
What about the moment or the person you are with can you enjoy via your 5 fabulous senses?
This is how you can start to live a sensual existence or augment the one you’re already in!
2. Do it in the moment!
When I do my gratitude practice each night, I take the time to feel gratitude for things that may not be happening in that very moment.
Little things that would otherwise go unnoticed get the opportunity to be seen through the eyes of gratitude.
This allows more of those things to come my way and puts me into a habit of appreciating them.
I am then MUCH more likely to appreciate those same things or people the next time I am actually in the moment with them.
That’s how you build a stronger practice of appreciation, because when it comes right down to it, everyone wants to be appreciated, acknowledged, and seen.
If love comes through you for these people or moments let them know with:
Sound (Mmmmm’s & Ahhhhh’s)
Sight (show them through a warm smile or present eyes)
Taste (give them a gift of something delicious)
Touch (pet, caress, rub, or just lay a hand on them)
Scents (breath in their scent and tell them you like it, or offer them an essential oil you enjoy).
Sending you Love and lIght this holiday Season!
Wishing you abundance, health and deep inner peace!
It’s A New Year, and a New Decade!
If you are anything like me you are creating some lofty goals for this next round of the journey…
In 2020 I will be getting my Doctorate in Chinese Medicine and writing my first book. If I can get around to creating my men’s course (The Allstar’s Guide to Understanding Women – A 2 Month Journey) it will be the cherry on top…. But no pressure on that.
Let’s talk about manifesting for a moment.
This word is being thrown about so much these days that it’s starting to lose its magic. People are often saying it with a sarcastic undertone.
“You can just manifest the money you need for rent….” hahaha.
“If you want a beloved partner, just manifest one….” hahaha.
As a spiritual practitioner who has been actively manifesting her life for over 2 decades, here’s what I can say about the actual practice of manifesting.
It’s more than just focusing on a positive outcome for a certain situation in your life and hoping, wishing, and praying that it comes to fruition.
It’s more than just walking on the beach and vibrating at the frequency you want to feel when you actually have the thing you manifest. Or sitting on your meditation cushion and dropping into that feeling.
While those things do help and are part of the journey to arriving at said destination, you also have to take action.
You need to bring some yang (action, heat, fire, structure) to your yin (receiving, being, breathing, feeling)
What is your PLAN?
What steps will you take to create this sparkling jewel of bliss in your life?
When creating this plan, work your way from the destination backward.
Imagine you have the thing your manifesting in your life, and ask yourself what would need to be in place 1 month before that thing/person arrives?
What would need to be in place 2 months before it arrives?
How about 3 months, and 4 months before it arrives?
Depending on the pearl of joy or accomplishment I am calling into my life, I will work my way 6 to 12 months backward.
Here’s an example of my manifestation map for the year:
12 months from now I will have my first book published and a Doctorate!
(don’t pick more than 3 things if mapping them all together)
In 11 months, my publishing company will be working with me to finalize the publication.
At 10 months, I will take a well-deserved vacation somewhere warm and do any final edits on my book that the publisher wants.
In 9 months, I will have submitted my final edition of the book to the publisher.
In 8 months, I will complete the doctorate program, and be putting the finishing touches on my book.
At 7 months, I will have 2 more chapters written (the book will have 7-9 chapters)
In 6 months – I will have 2 more chapters written
In 5 months – I will have 2 more chapters written. Doctorate moving along
In 4 months – I will have one or two chapters done.
In 3 months – I will have my Inline and outline for the book created.
In 2 months – I will have my 1st Case Study written and presented. I will have my book proposal written and sent to 2 publishers.
In 1 month – I will start the doctorate program and get started writing case study papers. I will spend 15-30 minutes on my book as many days as possible (I will map out each week individually according to the time available that week to work on the book)
As you can see the outline is a rough guideline that will change and morph as you go along… the point is not to have firm deadlines that stress you out but to have a general map that will keep you on track toward acquiring that which you’re manifesting.
If you are calling in something less tangible like more grace, your map could look something like this:
In 6 months I will be walking through my life in total grace, which means that I will be making choices from a place of love rather than fear, I will be responding to triggering moments with a pause rather than a reaction. I will take that “pause time” to step into my most gracious self, which is where I feel gratitude for all the good things I have in my life and appreciate myself for the reality I have created thus far.
Defining the less tangible goals for yourself is crucial….. In this example what does it mean to walk in grace? Who will show up in your life? Where will it take you in your emotional state? Where will it take you in the world?
The map would look like this:
6 months: I walk in pure grace 95% of the time.
5 months from now: I will appreciate myself for all the time and energy I have put into this endeavor of building up grace within myself by taking myself for a spa day.
4 months from now: I will begin the practice of the pause so that I can begin to change my reactions to triggering events or people.
3 months from now: I will have a better understanding of why I react to certain triggers, and why my reaction is what it is.
2 months from now: I will develop a strong gratitude practice.
This first month: I will bring more consciousness to the choices I am making and ask myself if I am making them out of love or fear?
In Tibetan Buddhism, there is a beautiful practice that incorporates both karma and emptiness. If you are not familiar with these terms, I will define them here.
Karma is what ripens from the seeds you plant in your heart, karmic seeds take 6 months to manifest. A seed could be an actual thing you do, and action or it could just be a thought you have, whether you take action on it or not, the seed gets planted.
Emptiness is the fact that nothing is anything until you perceive it as something. My teacher always uses the example of a pencil. If I give the pencil to a person, that person will perceive it like a pencil, but if I give that same pencil to a dog, it will perceive it as a chew toy, therefore the pencil is neither a pencil nor a chew toy, it is empty.
You can use the laws of karma and emptiness quite effectively in your manifestation journey by thinking about somebody in your life that you care about who you know wants the same thing as you and wishing them great success in getting it.
This plants the specific karmic seeds in your heart that you want to see come to fruition.
When manifesting something you have never created in your life before sometimes there is a disconnect, meaning there is a part of you that does not believe you can actually create this.
So you’ve got to manifest from a place of truth, this is Satya, one of the yoga sutras that says, “Let your life be a reflection of the truth you speak/ think.” Remember that your perception is not always the truth, pause to make space for truth in your mind.”
So let’s say I want to manifest earning $100,000.00 in one month. Sounds great, and I can vibrate to that frequency all I want, and visualize the money coming to me and pray to all my angels to bring it to me, but if somewhere inside of me there is a voice saying, “yeah right, that is never going to happen, you are not in the kind of profession that can do that,” then my manifestation practice is doomed from the start.
In this case, what I need to do is manifest from a place a truth. I know I can make over $10,000 in one month, so I know I could make over $20,000 in one month. If I truly believe I could make over $50,000 in one month then I can use that amount as my manifestation point and create my plan from there.
One of my biggest cautions when stepping into a strong manifesting practice in your life is to remember that if you get too myopically focused on creating your manifestation you could miss out on all the other gifts the universe is trying to give you.
Manifest lightly by releasing your attachment to having the exact thing you won’t show up. Add an element of surrender to your practice, in fact, you can use this practice to augment the outcome of what you’re manifesting.
The yoga sutras, it is the fifth of the 5 Niyamas, which are practices that relate to you personally. It’s called Ishvara Pranidhana – in a word SURENDER.
Surrender everything that you do to a higher source (Goddess/ God/ Spirit/ Allah/ Shiva/ Jah/ Tao) the name of your higher power is not important, what is important is that you make regular daily offerings to them. If you can consciously think to do it, offer everything to them.
This surrender and offering practice will allow you to receive all the extra gifts that come along with what you are manifesting.
For example, if you are calling in your beloved and you open yourself to receive that gift in all the forms that it comes in, you might deepen a connection with a dear friend or family member along the way.
If your manifesting an amazing physique it’ll be great to get to the gym 3x per week and eat healthily, but it will be 10 x more powerful and effective if you do it in honor of high power. Offer it to your “God,” or offer it to another person and plant a healthy karmic seed in your heart.
It could sound like this. “I’m going to go to the gym 3x per week for my friend who’s sick and can’t exercise herself. Every time I enjoy my healthy body I will dedicate it to her finding a new level of health in her body.”
Manifest with orgasmic energy!
Pleasure YOURSELF at least once a week so that your body knows the truth of pleasure, and has an up-to-date experience of what feels good.
When you self-cultivate (a better word for it than masturbating), you can make love to the vision you are manifesting. See it in your mind’s eye and cultivate the feeling you’ll have when it’s in your life. By adding sexual energy to the mix of manifestation you bring more creative juices to the party and step into more pleasure joy and fun…. Manifesting should not be taken too seriously.
If you want help CLEARING old stories that are blocking you from what you desire most is LOVE and in LIFE – and stepping into your most helpful narrative yet – Snag Your Intimacy Hour with me ;).
Willow Brown L.Ac.
If you want more
Had Enough Sugar? →
So have your adrenals!
If you’ve been following me for a while you know how much importance I place on happy healthy adrenals and how I believe they are one of the most fundamental keys to your happiness.
You may also have learned from me that the way that you feel, (happy, sad, anxious, stressed) has A LOT to do with your hormones. The moods that follow your month after month taking up precious space in your relationships, physical body, and mind are directly related to your estrogen, progesterone, and testosterone levels – even if you are in menopause, even if you are a man.
Here’s what I know, getting in the driver’s seat of your emotional roller coaster is much more effective than trying to get off the roller coaster.
Because the roller coaster that your hormones travel and subsequent moods they create are natural, and honestly, you’re better off embracing this reality than trying to escape it.
I remember when I first started to practice the Taoist Sexology practices that I’ve been teaching these last 7 years and how my intention was to “gain control” over my erratic emotions. It took me about 3 weeks of practice before I realized that releasing control was going to take me much further in life than trying to gain control.
I was 20 at the time I started this practice, which is known to not only give you better orgasms but also boost your overall health and vitality. I had just gone through a traumatic rape that left me pregnant at 19, and I knew that if I didn’t get the healing and support I needed I would shut down my sexuality and start going down the road of shame, pain, and not enjoying my body.
I decided to travel to Asia where I studied everything I could about Taoist Sexology and healing.
I had read several books by Mantak Chia, dog-eared and underlined Steven Chang’s book, (which to this day I consider the bible of Taoist Sexology), but I wanted some direct teachings from these teachers and others, so off I went on a 6-month adventure to heal and find myself again.
What I can say about this practice and all the amazing teachers I’ve been able to study with over the years, is that ultimately, YOU will be your best teacher. That’s why we call it Sexology because any “ology” is the study of or the observation of something, like psychology, biology, endocrinology, physiology, etc….. You become a researcher for your own sexual energy, and this can be both healing and incredibly expanding.
Your own sexual energy is made up of two things.
- One is knowing what turns you on and how to ask for it, your ability to have orgasms, have multiple orgasms, and experience a fulfilling sex life. Living free of shame and guilt.
- Two is having a deep connection to your hormonal system (endocrine). Knowing when your system is off and when it’s in balance and harmony.
What I have found over the last 20 years of studying both my body and thousands of other women’s bodies is that when you get to the bottom of one observation in your sexology journey, you’ll find yourself at the top of the next “observation.”
My student Jessica had grown up in a very religious family, where sex was taught to be shameful and sinful, so she had never allowed herself to find any pleasure in it. After 16 years of marriage to her husband, who she loved very much, and a couple of kids, she felt like she was losing it all. Everything she had worked so hard to create, seemed to be slipping through her fingers.
Her kids were in their teens and showing a lot of disrespect to both their parents, but primarily to her, and her husband was of no help, it seemed like he was starting to lose respect for her as well.
He started to say things he’d never said before like, “Well, if you took better care of yourself, maybe our sex life wouldn’t be in the dumps.” He even started to make rude comments about her body and blatantly eyeballing other women when he was with her.
Right before she reached out to me they had been walking in their local downtown area when an attractive young woman walked past them, he said, “Now there’s a figure you should be striving for honey.” OUCH!
The things he would say would shock her entire nervous system. She had never heard him talk like this! It felt like he didn’t love her anymore.
Having never really enjoyed sex, due to her Catholic upbringing, it wasn’t something she ever initiated.
So she decided she would try to initiate love-making more, only to feel rejected at every failed attempt.
We started working together and within one month she was working through all the old shame and guilt in regard to sex that she had learned as a child. She knew her body wasn’t perfect, she had always had a nice figure in her youth and could eat anything she wanted, but after the second child, things didn’t quite bounce back the same way.
Once Jessica got through the first layer of guilt and body shame, she realized she had been reaching for sweets every time she felt guilty or shameful about herself.
When she shared this with me, we decided that breaking her addiction to sweets would be an invaluable part of clearing out this old samskara (imprint/pattern/habit/mind-fuck) that left her in a wake of never truly enjoying the pleasures of the flesh.
Though she was doubtful that she could eliminate sugar and carbohydrates from her diet she was committed, so I put her on a “get off sugar” protocol, and within 2 days her cravings were GONE.
She was astounded. She had tried many times before to stop eating the sweets she craved, but never quite had the willpower she thought she needed.
When I explained to her that eliminating carbs was not about willpower – she laughed and said she did not believe me, but that she was open to trying. Within the first week of her “get of sugar” protocol, she was feeling much lighter.
If you’d like to learn about this magical “get off sugar” protocol Jessica took, please join our FREE Eliminate Sugar Completely Challenge.
Within 2 weeks Jessica started to see that little pudge she had carried around her midriff since baby number two, melt away. She was motivated by the results she was seeing and kept on top of her new diet. She had eliminated all bread, pasta, cookies, chocolate, sweets, and even fruit, and really did not crave any of it – she was amazed!
Her knee and wrist pain that had been bothering her for several years disappeared and her neck and shoulder pain was starting to diminish. She was definitely sleeping better and waking up with more energy.
Her afternoon 4 pm energy-dip that always had her stopping at coffeetopia for a latte and a cookie was still there, but only by half. (We would work on her adrenals next to totally eliminate that).
Her skin was clear as a bell and much brighter, as were her eyes. She was taking the routine exercises she’d been doing for years to the next level and even adding in some pilates classes.
Jessica was on a roll, and she was not about to stop! We worked on her adrenals, her ovaries, her pituitary, and her hypothalamus (all hormone glands) and we got her gut functioning better, which is where 90% of your serotonin is produced. Serotonin is a hormone that makes you feel happy and at peace, not to mention helps you sleep well and digest properly.
About two months into our work together Jessica noticed her husband’s eyes scoping her booty, and she also noticed she liked it! It gave her a little zing through her yoni and pop to her confidence, which we were also working on.
We did a coaching session to boost her confidence in initiating sex after all the fails that still lingered in her memory and when she actually initiated and took charge of the sexual encounter, she not only had the most fun she’s ever had but she experienced the most pleasure – followed by the best orgasm she’s ever had!
As she continued to live her Sexology she noticed that her kids were treating her differently and everything in her life was changing for the better. She was not without her hard days, and ever-changing moods, but she was not resistant to those times.
She knew how to work with those low days, and she would never go back to getting stuck in them again, she knew how to move the energy in her body, whether it was stress, anxiety, worry, or grief, she always had somewhere to turn to.
I share Jessica’s story with you because it is a beautiful example of what’s possible when you begin to change the inner landscape of your life.
By letting go of the limiting beliefs and old stories that hold you back, you can rebirth yourself into the woman you were meant to be.
We are thrilled to be offering a fun FREE Get Off Sugar Completely 4-day Challenge, in which I will teach you how to use the same exact protocol Jessica used to eliminate inflammatory carbohydrates from your diet.
We will keep the complex carbohydrates found in veggies in your diet, but we will do a deep cleaning of all the sugars that make your gut wall inflamed and disrupt the balance of your microbiome.
You will notice tons of other inflamed areas in your body heal within the 4 days of our “Challenge,” which will motivate you to keep going. Joint pain, brain fog, stress, anxiety, bloating, gas, skin, sleep, and outlook on life will disappear or improve dramatically!
If your system is extremely toxic you may experience detox reactions such as headaches, malaise, sleeplessness, or severe moods, but if you stick with it beyond our 4-day challenge you will certainly see the benefits soon!
While many people are getting swept up in the anxiety of these uncertain times, I am staying grounded and remaining positive…Not because I am naturally that way, but because I have been using the following Taoist principles every day!
The good news is that you can use these same principles *without* spending a lot of time on the computer because I know you are maxed out on screen time like the rest of the world.
So let’s get right to it!
Taoist Principle 1: Slow Deliberate Movement
Spend 20-30 minutes a day doing the slow deliberate movement, which means you are very present with your movements, and actually feeling the energy move through your body as you breathe and move!
- This could be taking a very slow walk through your yard, feeling each footstep as it lands and lifts on the earth.
- Or a slow stretch routine that allows you to really feel into the meridians in your body (meridians follow the muscles and tendons; trust you are feeling them even if you don’t know where they are).
Taoist Principle 2: Make a Magical Food
Since you are eating more these days, why not put a little magic into your food?
What does it mean to put magic in food? It means to set an intention before you prepare a meal, for example: “My intention for this meal is to make something that makes me feel lighter, happier, and less worried today.” That would be a great intention for a breakfast meal!
Then as you make the food, sing or hum or add some extra spices that excite your food.
As you eat your food, chew slowly and deliberately, and as you take in the nutrients of your food imagine also taking in the nutrition of your intention.
This is actually the perfect time to do a cleanse, so if you would like some guidance with that. It’s Spring, you’re stuck at home for another 3 weeks or more, why not do a 10-day cleanse?
Make a bone broth, what could be more grounding, centering, and amazing for your immune, vitality, and libido than a bone broth…. Never made a bone broth? Well now’s the time my friend!
Taoist Principle 3: Develop a Daily Gratitude Practice
While times are challenging, and there’s no doubt the sense of security you felt two months ago has vanished, or at least shifted, this is a golden opportunity to take inventory on what’s working for your health happiness, and well-being, and what is not.
Make a list of each, and without worrying about what is not working, place the list of what is going well in your world in front of you each day and read it out loud, feel free to add to it as the days pass. Simply sit and feel a deep sense of gratitude for each item on your list until you feel a lightness in your entire nervous system.
Taoist Principle 4: Awaken Your Sensuality
Spend 5 minutes each day in total devotion to each one of your 5 senses.
Spend an entire minute tuning into what you can hear inside your body, inside your room, and outside.
Spend an entire minute tuning into what you can smell.
Spend an entire minute tuning into what you can taste.
Spend an entire minute tuning into what you can feel with your fingers – run them over your body, and focus on the inner elbows, wrists, and thighs.
Spend an entire minute tuning into what you can see, squint your eyes so your vision is blurred a bit, and take in the textures, shapes, and colors
Taoist Principle 5: Tune into the Moon
Look to the sky at night and notice what is happening with the moon is it waning or waxing, full or new, take notes on how you feel in your body and in your mental state with each passing day of the moon as it shifts through its 4 phases.
Then send it to me in a month’s time! I would love to see how your mood changes with the moon.
Taoist Principle 6: Take a Shamanic Power Nap!
What’s a Shamanic Power Nap???
It’s when you lie down flat on the ground, you can place a pillow under your knees and a small cushion under your head if you like. Place one hand over your heart and one hand over your navel and breathe deeply as you listen for an intention to bubble up from your heart. Usually, one word or a short phrase, like “peace,” “wake up energized,” or “trust the unknown.”
Then tell your body to breathe deeply until you fall into a restful sleep, and set an alarm to wake you up about 20 min after you go out.
These are some of the SIMPLEST ways to stay calm and connected to your own pulse during a challenging season. It does require you to actually DO these things though. Start today, pick just one and try it on for size.
Lots of love,
Shame is the Opposite of Vitality! It’s the Silent Killer.
Shame, next to fear, is the most debilitating emotion you can endure. Whether it’s a fleeting moment of embarrassment or a deep well of intense self-doubt that’s been with you your whole life, shame steals your vital life force energy.
Few emotions are draining for your Chi.
What is Shame anyway?
You know what it feels like, you’re familiar with the terrible shrinking quality that makes you want to hide your face behind your hands…
But what is a shame, beyond an emotional state?
Let’s break it down. Physically shame feels like a sinking inward, a recoiling of the heart, a rounding of the shoulders, a posture of protection.
Emotionally it oppresses your inner light.
Shame is different from guilt. Guilt is when you feel like you did something wrong. Shame is when you feel like you are wrong.
Shame is a rabbit hole that keeps going and going until you learn to stop it, clear it, and become immune to it.
Becoming immune to shame means it no longer has a grip on you. In fact, you can become so immune to shame that it doesn’t even occur to you to shrink away when the person you most admire tells you you’re not good enough for them.
If you’re still living in the grips of shame, there is no shame in that.
It’s a deeply ingrained emotion that we as a human species are still climbing our way out of.
You’ll know it still has a hold on you if you hear the word in your head, “I’m not good enough,” or “I’m just too much for most people.”
This message is an imprint that was likely stamped into your DNA at a very early age, perhaps all the way back to when you were in the womb.
It carries on into your childhood, teens, and early adulthood, keeping you from living out your highest potential.
What is your highest potential? It’s the life you wish you had, the money you dream of, the home you desire, and the relationship you envy.
Shame is like a wet blanket over your highest potential. It dims the light within you that is your vitality, creativity, confidence, and authentic drive.
This deep sense of shame can inhibit you well into your 30’s, 40’s, 50’s, and beyond.
It will affect your relationships.
It will affect your finances.
It will affect your health.
It will affect your work.
You have to choose a different path.
A path of being worthy!
Now let’s talk about the first major shame trigger – body shame.
Your body is your vehicle in this life, it’s a beautiful temple to be honored, tended to, and cared for. If you’re stuck in body shame you will not feel that way about your vehicle (your body).
You could have a lot of contempt for your body, especially your belly, breasts, and skin, or even your penis or vulva. You might hear regularly in your head that you need to work out more, do more sit-ups, hit the trail every day, and do more push-ups so your arms don’t get flabby.
While I’m a huge advocate of exercise, doing it in a state of resentment, shame and doubt are not healthy. You’ve got to let go of the drill sergeant, and start talking to your body with kindness and love!
I dare you to rub some coconut oil over your least favorite parts of yourself tonight, (thighs, belly, breasts, arms) and repeat the words, “I love you, I love you, I love you.” This sacred practice will help you transform the voice of shame, that is so loud in your mind, into one of kindness and love.
One of the most common things I see with my patients and clients is an unfortunate estrangement from the natural feminine or masculine aspects of themselves. My client Beth, had grown up hating her body, in fact it was part of her family culture. Her Mom hated her own body and her sisters were also obsessed with the way they looked. All these women were gorgeous in their own ways.
Through my eyes, the Mom looked slender, and healthy, with a shine to her eyes and hair and a glow to her skin. It was shocking to hear of her contempt for her body and made me quite sad for not only her daughters but women-kind.
Beth’s sisters were both fit, healthy, and had straight teeth, and nice smiles, and when she told me that their outer appearance came from a deep inner hatred of the small amount of cellulite on their thighs I cringed!
I’d like to pause here.
I have a new word for cellulite.
It’s luvulite – pronounced love-you-light!
Try it out ladies.
And guys, if you reading, don’t go around telling your woman you love her cellulite – that will not translate well. Instead tell her you to love her legs, that she has a beautiful body and you really enjoy feeling it against yours.
Back to Beth… in just 3 sessions we worked deeply and efficiently to eradicate the voice of shame that had been running on repeat her whole life. It no longer has a grip on her.
Of course, the “habit” of that voice has the potential to creep back in, but Beth is now armed with powerful practices and tools that are entirely unique to her, they came from within her. So she can battle that shame anytime it tries to sneak back in with ease and grace until the “habit” of body shame is completely replaced with the “habit” of acceptance and love.
Now that she is no longer stuck on the body shame hamster wheel, she can start to see herself as a woman, and embrace her femininity in the way she has always envied other women doing.
She can let go of her masculine, militant, “work harder, push further,” voice and start listening to a new voice that says, “yes, child, that’s the way, if that feels good in your body then do it.” and, “well beautiful girl, I think today is a resting day, no need to push yourself while you’re bleeding, just rest it out.”
My client Mark is one of that sensitive kinds of guys, he carried a heavy load of shame around being this way.
He’d grown up with a very “man’s man” kind of father and his brother took after his Dad, so that left Mark always wondering what was wrong with him…. Why did he have to feel so much?
Mark could not remember a time he did not feel shame, self-doubt, and self-hatred. He had always been sensitive to words, looks, energetic frequencies, and vibes from others. He felt this, especially from his family, and lived with this very ‘grating” feeling that no one understood him, therefore he felt he’d never find anyone who could.
Our journey together took more time, but within 6 sessions Mark was able to peel away several of the thick layers of doubt and shame that kept him from attracting relationships where he was truly understood.
He had to let go of some friends and come to terms with certain family members, he had to understand them, rather than trying so hard to get them to understand him. This completely changed the way he related to the world around him…. And what do you know? The world around him began to shift.
He just started dating a gorgeous girl, who deeply admires his innate sensitive nature! He is now finding a beautiful balance within himself in relation to his masculine and feminine energies.
Regardless of your gender, orientation, or identification, you have a masculine side, who gets sh*^ done, and you have a feminine side who enjoys just being.
When you have a healthy relationship with both of these sides you become more whole, more of you is available and you are walking in the presence of your highest potential.
Let me know – Do you experience BODY SHAME? And if you do, what does it stop you from experiencing?
If you want help releasing that for GOOD – book your Intimacy Hour with me. This is the absolute most inexpensive way to begin to work with me – and you’ll be blown away at what is possible in just 1 hour of dedicated support.